Tuesday, January 2, 2018
Grieving
9:34 AM
The kiddos returned home today, so I knew I had to attempt a bit of normalcy before they arrived. I had to go to Target to return some sheets I purchased for dad’s hospice bed, pick up some milk, and other household staples. The familiarity of Target and grocery shopping was too much. I cried a lot at the Target.
Surely, there should be some sign we should be able to wear when we are grieving to let others know - perhaps the homeless chic attire should have given it away, but I’m fairly sure I looked like that most days even while my dad was still alive. We need something more obvious - like the Scarlet Letter but instead of an A perhaps just G for grieving or an M for mourning?!?
Someone honked at me today while I was driving and I screamed inside my car ... MY DAD JUST DIED! Then I laughed at myself until I started crying again. Is that even normal? I’m going with yes, yes it is.
I picked up ESN from their dad’s house this afternoon. I screamed at them on the drive home and used 327 F-Bombs because Sophie and Nate immediately started fighting in the backseat. Then I started cry-yelling (that’s a word!) at them that I would never ever see my dad again. Then we all started crying. For sure not one of my finest mom moments. I can only hope that they will show me so much grace and one day understand that this is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to navigate as a parent.
So, that’s my day in a nutshell. I probably won’t share every day but writing is my therapy, and one year from today I will be able to look back and see how far I’ve come ...
I love that when I loaded this photo, Facebook automatically tagged my dad.


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Just a Mom
I am NOT a doctor, nor do I play one on this blog.
I AM a wife.
I AM the mom of 3 wonderful children.
I AM my son's pancreas.
The information provided on this blog is from our personal experiences with Type 1 diabetes. Because something works for us does not mean it will work for you.
Please consult your doctor if you have any questions or concerns about your health care options.
I AM a wife.
I AM the mom of 3 wonderful children.
I AM my son's pancreas.
The information provided on this blog is from our personal experiences with Type 1 diabetes. Because something works for us does not mean it will work for you.
Please consult your doctor if you have any questions or concerns about your health care options.
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