You know when your kids get sick and you hate it for them but you also hate it for you too? When I have to give Emma breathing treatments it's like I know this is helping her but OMG-I have so much to do right now I just don't have time for this. I always just think about the fact that we only have to do it for a few days and then she will be better and we can put away all the meds, the nebulizer, all of the tubing and the mask. Done - out of sight and out of mind.
I keep waiting for this to all go away. I'm tired. Oh so tired of pricking Nate's tiny little fingers 10 times a day. YES, 10 times a day. Right now we are doing 3 shots a day but sometimes 4. It makes me sick to my stomach when I have to give them to him. I know I would HATE it if it were me getting the shots. It's beating me down. I am just waiting for it to go away. It's exhausting to think that this is forever! It's not going away. Not. Ever. Going. Away.
Ok, so I've really been doing pretty well with all of this but today it just hit me. I am exhausted. I want my old life back. I want diabetes to hit the road! Adios! Don't let the door hit ya . . . ok, you get the picture. I'm so freaking tired of counting carbs I could scream & its only been a little over 2 months. No one understands what it requires and no one knows how exhausted I am. NO ONE GETS IT!
Ok, I think I just fell asleep sitting here so I am going to take my sad, tired self to bed and get some rest. Only 3 hours until Nate's next bg check.